Fashion Girls

Poking a Bruise

The Washington Post Sunday magazine has a relatively new feature:  DateLab, where they send a couple out on a date, then interview them afterwards to find out what they thought of each other.  Here's the most recent column:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/08/08/AR2006080800979.html

I am completely fascinated by this feature.  I am amazed by the things that people will say to reporters -- knowing that those things are going to be printed in the Sunday glossy for all to read.  The weekly absolute disconnect between what the woman is thinking and what the man is thinking fascinates me, in the same way that a bruise going from purple to green is fascinating/disconcerting/unsettling.

I wonder, when I read this feature, if my amusement/horror/disgust with the interviewees is a sign of my getting older.  I cannot imagine participating in the entire enterprise, but if I did, I definitely would mind what I said to a journalist afterwards.  I think, though, in a world where people blog their every emotion, many just don't realize this is going to be Printed!  In the Newspaper!  Where Everyone and His Mother can read it!

Mindy, not big on reality TV, but totally fascinated by reality "news"
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Posted on Aug. 14th, 2006 at 06:42 am | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Comments


[info]french_teacher

I encountered the DateLab a couple "episodes" ago and had forgotten to keep watching for the next one, so thanks for the pointer.

The first time I found this (I read the Post on line), I went back through the archives to read all the accounts so far, and I've noticed that the accounts have changed their style a bit. The earliest ones were shorter and less amusing/humorous/horrific. I don't know if the change is one of editorial guidance and tinkering, or if the people presently doing this are just more "chatty" in their comments about their dates.

The girl this week was pretty mind-boggling if you ask me. She wants someone who looks preppy, and then she's disappointed when he's not into the artsy stuff and independent films that she and her friends are?

Posted on Aug. 14th, 2006 11:45 am (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

(Anonymous)

umm


People tell me I am pretty preppy and look like a yuppie....I did go to a really preppy high school....all though I am not WASPy looking.

I definitely would have been into her artsy stuff and indie films.

She's a little older than me...but she is still a hottie.

I think she made the right choice...don't settle for what you don't want...as far as I can see this is what this whole datelab experiment is all about. Finding out whether or not people will settle or compromise for what they are really looking for.

I am surprised there are not more complaints from the datelab dates!

Posted on Aug. 14th, 2006 02:10 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]french_teacher

Re: umm

Certainly a "meet your future spouse" is no more likely with Datelab than it is with any blind date or a matchmaking system.

I probably picked the wrong term when I used "mind-boggling" earlier.

But if someone specifies "preppy" for appearance, I still think she should not be surprised when the guy turns out to be more conservative and traditional.



Posted on Aug. 14th, 2006 05:08 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

(Anonymous)

Re: umm

Hi, guys, Jen here, from the Date Lab date. One thing that surprised me is that they asked what I was looking for and I included a laundry list of descriptions that yes, included the words 'a funny prep' and 'WASPy-looking,' but also included 'a goofy/caustic hipster,' 'quirky,' and 'a sensitive artist.' All I meant by WASPy is that I tend to be attracted to guys with Anglo features, but I also mentioned that I preferred guys who chose U Street over Georgetown, who might dress like they're from Burlington, VT, and who enjoy independent films and bookstores. I also said I like casual guys who wear flip-flops and t-shirts on dates, so I think I did a decent job communicating the type of guy to whom I'm usually attracted. The Post needed an angle, obviously, and they took two words, formed them into a catch-phrase, and ran with it. So please, remember to take everything you read with a grain of salt.

I'm curious about the first poster, who wondered about people not filtering what they say to reporters...trust me--there was sooooooooo much more I could have told the Post. Perhaps you were as baffled as I was that Aubrey shared with me--and then a major newspaper--that he is uncomfortable around gay people? Anyway, apologies if I offended--that certainly wasn't my intent.
Posted on Aug. 15th, 2006 02:31 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]mindyklasky

Re: umm

Jen - thanks for taking the time to post! (How did you find my little blog?!?)

And thanks, mostly, for clarifying the process of DateLab and how the editing worked. I think that I had assumed that they would select *typical* elements of what folks said, rather than selecting individual phrases to make the story what they wanted to tell. (And, for the record, I think that your other descriptive phrases are well-chosen and convey a definite "type" that is not at all consistent with the match-up they made for you.)

In any case, you didn't *offend* me at all. I appreciate your providing insight into your participation in the Lab. Are you pleased that you did it? Do you have any regrets?
Posted on Aug. 15th, 2006 02:45 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

(Anonymous)

Re: umm

Mindy, there's a link on the Date Lab web page to your 'little' link--you're big-time! Glad to hear you're not thinking I'm some shallow, hard-to-please, exhibitionist bimbo. The whole Date Lab experience has been a blast--the key is to just enjoy it for what it is--one evening with someone with whom you may or may not hit it off, and a great meal. Aubrey's lifestyle seemed like such an opposite extreme to me--it was like going on a date with a caricature--kind of surreal. But SO surreal, in fact, that it was incredibly amusing and entertaining and has made for great fodder. AND, I got to enjoy an fantastic meal at my favorite restaurant (shameless plug for Komi--they were wonderful!)--so how can I complain? It's just been fun and silly and if people can handle a conversation with a stranger, I would definitely recommend it.
Posted on Aug. 15th, 2006 02:52 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]french_teacher

Re: umm

The whole experience sounds so much less shallow to me when you have the room to expand on your preferences, reactions to the guy, and expectations for the entire experience, Jen.

In the Post's version, the personalities of the people and "what it was really like to do this" don't come through nearly so well for me.
Posted on Aug. 16th, 2006 10:57 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

(Anonymous)

Re: umm

Yeah, unfortunately, that's the challenge of squashing three hours into one page. People have been so quick to form judgments when they don't stop to think that they weren't actually on the date and can't POSSIBLY know the extent of what transpired. Yikes!
Posted on Aug. 18th, 2006 01:15 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]mindyklasky

Interesting - I hadn't noticed the change in editorial slant over time... I'll keep an eye out for it in future postings!
Posted on Aug. 15th, 2006 02:39 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

(Anonymous)

Editorial slant

I'm guessing, if people are detecting a shift in style, it's simply because there are different writers. I found the original articles to be a bit dry (but then, I, too, refrained from sharing the really juicy stuff from the Post), and wondered if I was so amused by this weekend's column because it was so personal to me.
Posted on Aug. 15th, 2006 02:54 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]mindyklasky

Re: Editorial slant

Hey! Wait! Share the really juicey stuff with us! :-)

Jen, thanks for stopping by - you've definitely given us a great new perspective on the column!

Posted on Aug. 17th, 2006 12:38 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

(Anonymous)

Re: Editorial slant

Thanks so much for being open to my perspective! I wish everyone were as welcoming and open-minded! Never thought I'd have to apologize for going on a date and it not being a love connection--what's so unusual about that? :)
Posted on Aug. 18th, 2006 01:16 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply